oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I want to fling myself into the sun
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize