I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize