you win again, gameday.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
