is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
