Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
