she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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