benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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