Dual....:-)
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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