No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
