why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i came on her dog
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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