Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
