we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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