Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
