Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
