All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize