i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
