bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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