windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
