She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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