She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
