Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
