She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
