i already hear my dad disowning me
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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