Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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