I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize