His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
