I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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