i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
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