in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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