meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
