yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
