I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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