you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
