Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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