This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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