Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So vagazzling was a success
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
