mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
