Already got asked if we're dating
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
