i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
