i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
They are going to name an STD after you.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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