if you like me you must not know who I am
That's intense
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
