but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
