I heard we made out
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
