I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize