I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
