So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Randomize
