where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Buhtt sex?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
