Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize