what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
