my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
